Persistence
The art of refusing to give up as you surrender the things that no longer serve you
Sometimes you have to cut your losses. Trim the fat. Scale down in order to scale up. All the cliches. Most of them taken From over watching Billions, Survivor, and football.
I’ve been a football fan my entire life. Something my family ingrained in me. We grew up watching football. The aroma of white sweet potatoes roasting in the oven as I came home from Hebrew School on every Sunday in the fall was such a core emotional memory for me.
Then I went to college at University of Florida home of the Fighting Gators! I walked into that stadium, saw a man go around the stands leading an old fashioned cheer “Two bits, four bits, six bits, a dollar…” which would normally make me groan in its colloquialism but in this case, with the roar of the crowd of over 80,000 in attendance, my heart fell strong and hard.
That’s something most of my creative friends don’t share with me. My fierce and unending love of sports and franchises who have repeatedly broken my heart. But….but there’s an upside to being a New York Jets fan. There are those moments. Rare. Infrequent. But there. There is resilience. There is payoff. There is striving.
Very much like the artists’ life. And just like writing, I just can’t quit the NYJs no matter how hard I try.
I had a discussion with a writing friend recently where we discussed whether it’s better to be kind in critique or real. I’ve always gone real. I don’t think being unnecessarily careful in the process is the kind route. Being honest is. How do you know what to fix without honest input that doesn’t attempt to shield the listener.
Also, I believe writing is sacred. I always have. If we are going to live in this rarified air, we better learn to start by subverting our ego. Nobody gets to the kingdom without first getting on their knees. Or whatever that looks like to you.
It’s true in recovery. It’s true in life. Once you recognize that you are not steering your publishing journey you can let go and let good. See what I did there?
Writing takes humility. It takes divinity. I may be breathtaking(a Gilmore Girls reference) but I am not godly or godlike. I am a humble servant. Sitting at the altar, waiting for a dose of inspiration. Aren’t we all? We call it our muse. We do Netflix binges in order to find it. We read extensively. In other words, we reach to believe in.
Inspiration—the word itself means to breathe life into. In Hebrew, we call that neshama. It means the divine spark breathed into us by G-d. I think that’s pretty cool.
Not to get super religious here and certainly not taking from only one tradition, here is my favorite prayer from St. Francis of Asisi:
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace:
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy.
O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
That right there is a recipe for life. Faith instead of doubt. Hope instead of despair. Joy instead of sadness. Understanding instead of being understood. For better or worse isn’t that an apt description of the full writing life?
And you know who you should pardon, console, and give to? Yourself. That’s right. Self compassion is key to thriving as an artist. Just as much as faith, hope, and light are.
You need to tell yourself it’s ok to make mistakes and then let yourself make them over and over again for as long as it takes to make it right. Keep trying. Keep writing. Keep being open. Keep tuning in and showing up.
And maybe, just maybe this will be the year. Maybe the Jets will not be hapless. Maybe the Gators will beat Miami! Maybe. Who knows. But if they don’t suit up and show up, we’ve got literally no chance.
This week I spent finishing up revisions for my cozy mystery that comes out in March. Spellbound by Murder. I really am in love with this book which I hope will be a series. It took me four years, hours of discussion with my agent until I landed on this concept. Which I shaped up with her help. When she shopped it, it sold pretty quickly. There were so many times I wanted to give up. Maybe cozies weren’t for me. Maybe I couldn’t do it. She kept telling me to send her the next partial. Then the next. Until I landed. That’s what this writing life is all about—trying so many times until it works. It only does when it does and you only get there if you keep trying.
Reccs this week:
Reading The Lost Bookshop by Evie Woods and I’m loving it. I can’t remember the last time I had such a good time reading a book. I’ve read many books that were page turners. Many that were heartfelt and had strong themes. This book has all of that. Plus, it’s fun! Highly recommend.
I read a story about how artificial lights have now made birds work longer days. Do we really need our dinosaur ancestral species more angry with us? No wonder they created Angry Birds.
This article about entitled “Simple, science-backed habits that add years of health and vitality without expensive treatments.” by Heather Hurlock reminded me how essential social interactions are for overall health and wellness especially as we age. I am hermit like in nature but I do love a good hang with a close friend every now and then . It may be time to put one on the books!
I love the Department of Salad substack newsletter and this recipe looks so good! Going to try over the long weekend coming up. Mostly I love this newsletter because Emily is a really good writer. Her imaginary boys in the lab are also huge draws.
I also thoroughly recommend a bookstore date! Here’s a pic of JKR and I at Barnes & Nobles. It was a great date—-we had lunch at the cafe as he read up on his Fantasy Football magazine and I window shopped. I didn’t actually get myself anything to read this time because my TBR pile is EXTENSIVE but I did get a yummy cookie and some ideas for the next time we go back there. I love shopping in a bookstore. I love a good indie store, but my heart sort of melts for B&N, home of many such dates for me and the hubs.
Also, check out what I found in the stacks…The Sister Pact! It’s always exciting to see your books on the shelf, but my debut, almost 15 years later, with a re-release over a year ago….priceless.
Until next week…as always, I would love it if you pre-ordered my book, Spellbound by Murder which comes out March 10, 2026. xoxoxo
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